DS9 Document EFTA00664485

From: Subject: Report H 152: A land of contradictions Date: Sat, 19 Feb 2011 17:44:45 +0000 Hallo dear friends! I finally figured out why I don't go w/ the girls in the office: I'm not a girlie-girl. I don't run around saying: "happy valentine's day" passing out candy wrapped in red paper w/ little bunnies. One of the perks of living here is the non-christmas and non-celebrations of stupid days such as valentine's day. Yet, every person I see has to chant: "happy valentine's day". Ironically I experienced my first baby shower in The Middle East! An Arab-colleague threw a baby surprise baby shower for another Arab-colleague. The mom-to-be was not happy with the surprise at all. It was an awkward affair for all Europeans a Arabs because we don't do showers. The Americans were all comfortable, though! At the baby-shower there were lithe paper-figures spread on the table shaped in various baby-theme shapes. I pointed out that they should've been shaped like sperm like in the Jennifer Aniston movie... A colleague scarred me for life: We were 4 colleagues having a civilized dinner. I was just minding my own business enjoying my steak. Completely unsolicited my male colleague stuck his iPhone in my face with a dose-up picture of his penis! He wanted to show the picture he sends out to men on this gay-sex-website. It has a GPS-system that tells who is in the neighborhood so people can hook up... That something like that would exist in a country where sex outside of marriage is forbidden, not to mention gay-sex, really shocked me. Then my colleague's penis-picture on top of that! I'm so mentally scarred now... Some of the idiot faculty and staff at NYUAD (NYUAD has a strong preference to hiring people with a sub-zero IQ) says it's so safe here. Here are some of the news the past 2 weeks: 1. 4-yr old girl gang-raped by 3 adult men 2. 21 year old Emirate (this is the really shocking part) male drugged and raped by 2 Iranian men who filmed it 3. 2 women dragged into car, beaten and threatened to be gang-raped, but the Emirate men then kicked them out of car. 4. Attempts to trick women into stopping on highway to save non-existing baby 5. Attempts to make women stop car by throwing egg on front windshield of car. Turning on wipers makes the mess worse. 6. 2 year old sexually molested and beaten by real estate agent showing parents an apt 7. Not to the mention the general unrest in the Middle East. Considering we're an American university with the words "New York" in our name, it's a bit worrisome that we don't have an evacuation plan... To reiterate: NYUAD has a preference for sub-zero IQ employees... Be safe! EFTA00664485